Fast Food Review: Jack in the Box Chorizo Chili Cheesy Fries

I've had chorizo many different ways. By itself. In tacos. On pizza. Fresh off the grill and wrapped in pita bread, sweating bright red oil that stains your fingertips for the rest of the day. Sliced on a tapas plate with cheese. In a sandwich. And thrown on a plate with some fried potatoes at eight in the morning in the mountains of Baja, perhaps the single best breakfast of my life.

But I've never had chorizo on french fries. In truth, it never occurred to me to try. But then I saw a sign at Jack in the Box for their new Chorizo Chili "Cheesy" fries and I thought Well, okay, why not? It was only $1.99, and people always seem to enjoy when I try new fast food promotions. I have been told more than once that my suffering for my art is appreciated. (Although I must admit it gave me pause when I saw the basic cheese fries are only $1.79. Really? The chorizo chili is only valued at 20 cents? That can't be a good sign.)

And done correctly, I could see these being really good. 

But here comes one of the more predictable sentences you will ever read on this blog: they were not good. 

As you may have noticed in the pictures, all of the chorizo chili was shoved to one side of the fries, painting one wall of the box with grease and cheese. Most of the fries had no topping. I'm not a fan of Jack's boring, shoestring fries, but if they are fresh out of the oil I will still eat them. These were barely room temperature, tasting only of that starchy, mushy flavor of potatoes that have been cooked hours earlier.

The chili wasn't bad. Not particularly good, but pretty tasty with a slight spice. Only here's the thing: without exaggeration, it was the saltiest thing I have ever eaten. I drank three 16oz glasses of water after eating the chili and it made no difference. I had a fourth glass after a while; the taste of salt remained in my mouth for more than two hours. 

I guess I shouldn't have expected too much from a $1.99 snack from Jack in the Box. Chorizo chili cheese fries are an excellent idea, and at some point I may even try to make some myself. But I will never try these again.