Moules Frites

I had planned to make mussels and fries for two of my best friends, although I realized I no longer have a reliable deep fry thermometer, so I went to buy one at Sur La Table. I picked out the nicest one they had (it still only cost $18.)

"Are you a cooking student or a professional chef?" the lady at the counter asked me. Apparently those are the only types of people who would spend a whopping 18 bucks on a kitchen gadget. I had no idea.

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"Neither," I said, "I'm just cooking mussels and fries for my two favorite girls."

"Ohhh," she gushed," that's sweet. How old are they?"

"36 and 28," I said.

I don't think that was the answer she was expecting.

Anyway, I cooked the fries twice, in the classic Belgian manner. I cooked the mussels in a broth of wine, shallots, butter, garlic and beer. My friends said they were very good, although I can't say, as I do not like mussels. I had two microwaved White Castle hamburgers.

Also, I forgot to chill the white wine. Luckily I had my frosted Angels mug. So while the two most beautiful girls I have ever known ate mussels cooked in beer and Belgian frites with roasted garlic mayonaisse, I ate my White Castle burgers with A1 sauce and drank wine out of a frosted baseball mug. I have issues.