Fast Food Review: Carl's Jr. Turkey Burger

If you had asked me to guess which fast food chain was debuting turkey burgers, I probably would have guessed McDonald's. Sure, turkey would seem out of place on their menu, but at least they have made efforts towards healthier items in the last few years. Jack in the Box probably would have been my second guess, if only because I could see them jumping at the chance to do a commercial with Jack chasing a turkey around like Rocky chasing a chicken.

Turkey is delicious and it's healthy, so Burger King would obviously have been my last choice.

Carl's Jr. would have been down at the bottom of my list, too. This is the chain that came out with a bacon burger modeled after a grilled cheese sandwich; a burger topped with a Philly Cheesesteak; even a 1400-calorie footlong burger last year. I would not have expected health to be of any concern to them.

I have aways loved turkey burgers, although, as you can probably guess from some of the things I eat, it has little if nothing to do with health. I just love the taste of turkey. I could give up red meat, I could probably give up seafood... but I could not give up turkey. There were many years when I rarely ate a hamburger, I mostly stuck with turkey burgers. Fatburger and Wolfe Burgers were my favorite.

Last night, I headed up Carl's Jr. to try out one of the turkey burgers. They are offered in three varieties: one with special sauce, one with guacamole, one with teriyaki sauce. I chose the first option, the one simply called "Turkey Burger" that comes with lettuce, pickles, mayo, red onion, tomato, and "special sauce." The cost was $3.62 with tax.

I thought it smelled good when I received it, and it felt pretty hefty. I unwrapped it and took a couple pictures.

Then, unfortunately, I took a bite. I'm not sure how else to say this so let's keep it simple: it was unquestionably the worst turkey burger I have ever had. It might well be the worst burger I have ever had. The veggies were sloppily thrown on the bun - you can see in the picture how the lettuce is about to slide out of the bun, which it did with the first bite - and the sauce was only covering one tiny patch of the patty.

But most importantly, the turkey patty was horrible. It had zero flavor and was the texture of a piece of chalk, a dried-out disk that required quite a bit of force to bite through it.

I needed a second opinion so I asked Elizabeth to try it. She is nowhere near as critical of fast food burgers as I am; she likes the Big Mac and the Whopper, both of which I hate. She took a bite.

"That's disgusting," she said.  

I removed a piece of the patty from the burger to get a better idea why it was so dried-out. I was not surprised to find the pock marks of a typical frozen, mass-produced patty. (A decade ago I used to buy turkey burgers in bulk at Costco and this is what they looked like, although they were always good when I grilled them.)

I put the piece between my thumbs and forefingers and tried to bend it; it would not bend at all. After a second of me exerting force it snapped in half.

I like the fact that Carl's Jr. decided to come out with turkey burgers, not just for the health aspect but to offer one more variety of sandwich. But I don't know what kind of turkey patties they use or how they decided to cook them. This turkey burger was the worst thing I have tried in a long time.

(I will point out that this Carl's Jr. is the same one I went to when I tried the hand-breaded chicken tenders for the second time and they were also horrible. That was the first time I went to this particular Carl's Jr.; this was the second. Maybe it's just the location. I have a hard time believing that all Carl's Jr. locations are going to make turkey burgers this bad, or else this is going to become a legendary fast food flop along the lines of the Arch Deluxe or that time Burger King decided to offer table service.)